Karaoke Forums

*shudder*

I Cannot STAND cats!!!! uhghgh!!

sorry, Babs, but I really hate 'em! !


DOGS on the other hand....... I love 'em to pieces!!

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I haven't seen Billy since I was last on over the weekend !  Hope he'd doing well

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Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

Where's my horse whip - when you least expect it - expect it

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[updown]~*~ MONKEY BUSINESS KARAOKE~*~ [/shadow][/updown][/glow]

Yep, I hate cats too.....They make great target practice and are loads of fun to watch when you hit one.

Be glad the thang didn't poop in your furnace.

If you set out a few large rat traps and bait them with tuna, the cat/kitten problem will be solved overnight.

Next time you need to fish an animal out of a hidey place, get you a length of small pipe or tubing and a piece of wire or stiff cord.....double the wire/cord and run it thru the pipe/tubing until you have a loop at one end and the loose ends of wire/cord sticking out the other end....Then stick the pipe/tubing into the hidey hole and slip the loop over the critter's head...Now pull the loose ends tight and it will allow you to pull the beast out of his hole by the neck.

If it is a cat/kitten, you can either continue to apply pressure on the wire/cord and hope he dies, or you can turn it loose in your house and spend the rest of your life enslaved by it and gushing over it.

The same snare device can be used to safely control your spouse when they get grumpy....I used it several times to drag my wife away from the soaps and into the kitchen/laundry room where she belonged....She used it on me whenever she wanted sex.

Oh you guys are so frickin' funny I can't stand it!     There's nothing like dead cat humor to make this place so incredibly funny.  Thanks to all of you for making my day so much brighter.  God bless all of you!!  :)  Peace!!

When I was about seven or eight, I got a big ladder(at least it seemed big then), and rescued a cat out of a tree.....when I got to the ground, it promptly scratched it's name all over my face, jumped the remaining three feet to the ground, and ran off........when you gonna post another song?........jj

A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man that his dog, regrettably, is dead.
The man, clearly agitated and not willing to accept this, demands a second opinion.

The vet goes into the back room, comes out with a cat, and puts the cat down next to the dog's body. The cat sniffs the body, walks from head to tail poking and sniffing the dog's body and finally looks at the vet and meows. The vet looks at the man and says,

"I'm sorry, but the cat thinks that your dog is dead too."

The man is still unwilling to accept that his dog is dead.

The vet brings in a black Labrador The lab sniffs the body, walks from head to tail, and finally looks at the vet and barks. The vet looks at the man and says, "I'm sorry, but the lab thinks your dog is dead too."

The man, finally resigned to the diagnosis, thanks the vet and asks how much he owes.

The vet answers, "$650."

"$650 to tell me my dog is dead?!?!" exclaimed the man.

"Well," the vet replies, "I would only have charged you $50 for my initial diagnosis. The additional $600 was for the cat scan and lab tests."

Since I have special powers and control the feline kingdom.
(Self proclaimed Cat girl )
I am sending my cats on a mission to certain forum members homes to
scatter fur all over your floors, poop in your sinks, scratch up your couches and
dig in all your plants.

Now go kittys go - shazam

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[shadow=pink][glow=deepskyblue]. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
[updown]~*~ MONKEY BUSINESS KARAOKE~*~ [/shadow][/updown][/glow]

These two starving bums are walking through an alley when one of them sees a dead cat. He runs over, sits down and starts to eat the cat, tearing the meat from its limbs.
He says to the other bum, "Hey, I know you're hungry, too. Why don't you eat some of this cat?"
"Hell no!" replies the second bum, "That cat's been dead for days, he's all stiff and cold and smelly!"
The first bum says, "Okay, suit yourself," and continues to eat everything, skin, muscle, guts, all but the skeleton.
A few hours later as they are walking down the street the first bum says, "Oh, I don't feel so good. I think there might have been something wrong with that cat." And just then, he pukes up a huge puddle of rotten cat flesh and guts with stomach bile mixed in, all half digested and looking like mush.
The second bum sits down next to the puddle and says, "Now you're talking! It's been months since I had a WARM meal!"

http://www.earlthedeadcat.org/

EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! SEE?!? That's EXACTLY why I hate 'em so much! They're so unpredictable! They walk around with their sly little im-too-good-for-you attitudes.....all mysterious...... then they pee on yer clothes for nothin' or scratch yer eyeballs out!! I'm literally gettin goosebumps just thinkin' about 'em! *shudder*

you talkin about ME postin' a song? right now my allergies are really bad I'm lucky I can speak let alone sing!! I'm itchin to record somethin though..... as soon as I'm able, I will!!


.... now I gotta go find an "I hate cats" Blinkie....... doubt I'll find one.

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found one

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Hey, I found a song with your name in it..gonna record it....gonna sub it....bet you can't guess the name of the song..............jj

FINAL KITTY RESCUE POST.   I saw him outside with the rest of the family.  Looks like he will be OK.

Phewwwwwww!  :D

Cute Bigdog!  Glad kitty is ok

Glad the kitty is ok!

Couldn't help feel for the Cat.....and you too!

This post was amazingly funny. Had the wife and I both in stitches

I love cats but they can be a pain in the butt most of the time!  :yes:

All I can say to Keith and Johnny is ........... watch out for the puddycats that are comin' to getcha!  A spell has now been cast and you don't wanna mess with that mystical stuff

I could just see Babs waiving her arms and chanting

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FlipSide Karaoke
Scott

Yeah, Keith, you just jinxed yourself dude. Now, your death will most assuredly be by a cat. Most likely it will be a big one, like a cougar or mountain lion. (or whatever cat variety they have in Loiusiana...) Better be careful and keep a watchful eye out, and if you hear the horses going nuts late at night.... best take protection with ya when you head out to the barn.

Ya shouldn't have talked bad about cats.  :no:  I'll never come down there now, I'd be looking over my shoulder non stop for a jumping cougar.

Seriously, glad the kitten was okay. I have never been a cat person myself, like Crystal I'm a dog person. But I wouldn't wish unneccesary harm to a cat. Heck, I've near hit the ditch quite a few times trying to avoid one that runs out in the street. (but I drive a 4 X 4, so ditches are not too big a problem for me, haha)

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♥ Laugh your heart out, dance in the rain. Cherish the memories, ignore the pain. Love and learn, forget and forgive. Because you only have one life to live. ♥

now that we all know he's ok bigdog i got a suggestion for you.....


everyone knows that you have to boil the kitty first to remove the fur, then you can slow cook him....

i know, it's sick, but hey-everyone here knows i am an animal person.  i just couldn't resist the temtation to make a sick joke!

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All work and no play make Homer something something

please tell me it's not "Crystal Chandelier" or however ya spell it. My dad sings that song at me all the time...

yes... I said "at me"

now I'm gonna go find it!

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