Karaoke Forums

Comforting to live in an age of "one idiot, one vote".


While looking at a house, a client asked me (the real estate agent) which direction was north because, she explained, she didn't want the sun waking her up every morning.

When I explained that the sun doesn't rise in the north it rises in the east (and has for some time), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff."

And then she voted.

I used to work in technical support for a 24x7 call center. One day I got a call from an Individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week". He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh.. Pacific."


And then he voted.

So my colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the admin assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving."


And then she voted.

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car. It's designed to cut through a seatbelt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the passenger side door's map pocket.

And then she voted.

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought two cases. The cashier multiplied two times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

And then they all voted.

I was hanging out with a friend of mine when we saw a woman walk by us with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I had to explain to her that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.

And then she voted.

I was picking up some sandwiches from the sub place last week and I asked the clerk which one of two sandwiches was better. The clerk didn't have an opinion but did say that the first sandwich was more expensive. With a quizzical look on my face and I asked, "If that's the case, why are they both listed with the same price on the menu?" To this, the clerk responded, "I don't think they tax the turkey."

And then he voted.

I was trying to find a carry-on suitcase in one of those huge discount stores and had become hopelessly lost. I stopped and asked a department manager where I might find suitcases. "Did you try in Luggage?" she asked, and returned to what she was doing.

And then she voted.

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because they were trained professionals and I was in good hands. "Now," She asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"

And then she voted.

So do we really want everyone voting?
Shouldn't there be a test?
Oh but wait, looks who's running? Nevermind.

!!! !!! Oh Phill.... It's SO true!! Those little stories have me in STITCHES!!!

It's like I always say.... I swear i say this EVERY day...

"Common sense is NOT very common"

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Hey Phil--here's another true story for you.

A buddy and I went to the local Fleet Farm to buy a funnel and a hose to make a beer bong. We got the parts we needed and stuck them together. When we got to the checkout, the young lady working there says, "I didn't know we sell those here!"

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Spreading the karaoke gospel

PLEASE REMEMBER THAT BECAUSE OF THE EXPECTED HIGH TURNOUT AT THE POLLS

THIS YEAR, REPUBLICANS WILL BE VOTING ON TUES. NOV. 2 AND DEMOCRATS

WILL BE VOTING ON WED. NOV. 3






..........Just kidding

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I'm Not Dead yet...... But every day Im getting Closer !

I thought I heard it was Democrats vote on Nov 2nd and Republicans vote on the 3rd.

And to think I thought Libertarians vote on Nov 2 and everyone else wasn't allowed to vote this year.... (how's that for hypocracy?)

That's not bad....the above stories....

I used to work at Chili's...and a table of six came in one day. I was taking their drink order...and the one guy asked "Can I have a screwdriver"

I freaked out...."OMG! Is there something broken on the table? Do you have to fix something?"

The table burst out laughing...and then I realized what he was actually asking for!

DUH!

I've got way too many stories to tell from my days as a manager in fast food. From cashiers, to customers.

Also from me as a customer.

I was in the drive thru and the order came to $4.77. I gave her $5.02, and she freaked (as she'd already hit the $5.00 in the register and finalized the sale.

So what did she do? mumbled and shook, and actually gave me back $5.25!

Being an honest person, I DID give her the $5.00 back and then explained to her WHY I gave her the two pennies.

Like Bill Engvall says, Here's your Sign!

I'll admit I recently paid for my food at the first drive-thru window, and then proceeded to drive home. When I got home, I reached for my food, and doh! I drove to a different restaurant and paid for food again, because I was not going to admit that I was the idiot that drove away without my food.

So YOU'RE the ONE!!!!
hehehe.....

Interesting results all around the country. Sorry to disappoint everyone here, but marijuanna isn't legal in Alaska again (the measure didn't pass).

The govenor can't appoint any more relatives to the senate (ballot measure passed)...

We're still waiting to find out who won our senatorial race... (the 'underdog' in the race at this point was elected govonor by only 562 votes for his first term of office!). Time will tell....

!! Oh, Crystal!!!!