I'm good at riddles :oh yeah:
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IOf Wallmart stays open all night can you buy beer at 3 in the morning?
Not when you're too drunk to find it Ollie, (this riddle was at least easy to solve)
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How come Safeway charges $2.39 for a can of kipper snacks yet in a dollar store they are onlly 79 cents.
Cuz they're more expensive.
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Should you sleep with your head to the north or the south.
Depends on where the screen on the notebook is when you zonk out after a night of passion with the notebook resting on your chest !
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What the hell has venus has to do with my sex life.
Maybe that's what's ruining mine as well. I wonder how much a class action suit would be ?
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And what does it have to do about rise and fall of the tides and womens menustration cycles.
That's more of a gynocologist situation. That certainly sounds like an excessive flow to me !
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How come sometimes the moon comes up when the suns going down and other times when the sun is coming up.
That's the way they do stuff. Don't ask me questions about moons coming up, when sons are going down. Let's keep this clean !
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Should your bedroom be to the east or west..
With opaque lining on the windows curtains you don't get glare on the notebook monitor either way so this is a moot question.
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How come years ago cities could provide services with 3% tax now they are all broke.
You ever notice all the pigeon xit in cities ? That's caustic over time and will break all sorts of stuff.
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How come when my car breaks its either 40 below or 110 degrees in the shade.
Because you're driving the same car that you were using to get your associates I/O degree back when you were my age. Probably needs an oil change.
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How come when I go to sleep on the couch I wake up with some preacher 6n tv telling me I am going to hell.
Because you're too cheap to get cable. Either that or since your stuck back in the 60's your evening activity is Perry Mason, Rowan and Martins Laugh-in, Hee Haw, Johnny Carson, Nightline, and you fall asleep but wake up to pee the bed when EUgene Scott is on
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. We BELONG TO the sixties, and I never graduated from the 70's. Constant dreams (at least three per week) that I'm going onto my 34th year of college, and the kids (I don't even get a private room in the dorm) are noticeably kids now (unlike dreams I had when I needed to repeat my 15th year of college to get my GPA up but instead it kept falling because I still cut classes to party) where the kids were closer to my age.. Now I realize (even in the dreams) that it's just not worth it to keep going to college to try to graduate, I'm just no novelty to the women around campus as a 34th year student at a 4 year undergrad BA liberal arts school. It's also kind've embarrassing telling the kids that I'm changing my major again (oh yeah, I also have taken about 33 years of summer school and my GPA keeps dropping so it's kind've futile to keep returning since odds are tougher I can raise my GPA by passing a few courses at this point with 30+ Years of D's, F's, and asking directions to class on the day of final exams to try to convince the prof to allow me to drop the course without penalty due to no fault of my own for cutting the whole semesters worth of classes).. What's worse, is I'm starting to realize that a few of these girls might soon not be attracted to me because I'll start looking noticeably older being in my 50's. So I'll likely get asked to find another room to sleep in the dorm nights while my teenage roomates score and I can't.. In the interim, half've the time in these dreams is trying to convince admissions that my paying all this money to keep returning to Skidmore was contingent (as an upperclassman) on me getting a private room like other senior males.. I just feel there might be certain emotional conflicts being stuck in a sweet with several roomates and being over 30 years older than the rest of the metriculated students..