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 Post subject: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 9:45 am 
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I went on vacation recently and had someone fill in for me on wednesday night only. I work this bar 3 nights a week. I scheduled my vacation so I would not miss any of my weekend nights because those are my busiest nights. This person has filled in for me before and does a great job, so I'm not worried about his abilities at all. In fact I got no complaints from the patrons, just that he did well.

The owner approaches me all ticked off last night. He said next time I go on vacation not to tell anyone. They barely made $300 in the bar that night. The funny thing is I only remember telling maybe 2 people. People may have known I was planning a vacation, but didn't know when.

I take vacation once a year - geez. Now I'm supposed to keep it a big secret.  LMAO

I'm thinking next year he can schedule a band instead. Then I won't get blaimed.

I guess it upset me so much because of the way he told me. I've been there for years - every weekend and Wednesdays without fail. Yeah i have no life.  LMAO

I just needed to vent a bit.

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 10:52 am 
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The owner approaches me all ticked off last night. He said next time I go on vacation not to tell anyone. They barely made $300 in the bar that night.



Sounds as though in his dry way you were paid a backhanded compliment and nothing more.

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 11:57 am 
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That was my thought also. He could have approached the situation so differently.

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 11:59 am 
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yeah I would take it as read he missed ya honey xxx :hug:

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 12:27 pm 
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NO Respect!  For some reason, some people just don't have any.  I'd go with the backhanded compliment approach.....

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 1:29 pm 
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What do they usually make when you ARE there?

The differemce is your next jump off point for a RAISE  :)  :)  :)


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 1:32 pm 
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What do they usually make when you ARE there?

The differemce is your next jump off point for a RAISE  



Now THIS is clever thinking !    :worship:

Hear that Babs ?  Time to assert yourself and make certain your pay is commensurate to your value  (or is it commensurate with ?)

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 1:53 pm 
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Some just don't know how to express warmth,  they are afraid to release signs of emotion. Old school business people SOME of the time,  even many older males won't let their hair down for fear of appearing mushy, or too soft.  Just the way some were brought up, and they can't transcend it. It's the school of "Expressing emotion directly makes you vulnerable".  "You were missed" to certain individuals is giving away control.  Sad but true.   It's a part of the older John Wayne complex that molded many males to feel "It's sissyish to soften".

Picture the "Sgt Carter" type on Gomer Pyle.


 Buying Wall mounting PA arms,  and backhanded compliments are good enough.  You won't change him,  try to learn to read him, and by now get to know when the old softy is showing his feathers  LOL

People like this often soften with age,  but don't hold your breath.  It took my dad til around 80 and my mom still has to twist his arm !

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Jul 26, 2007 1:54 pm 
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Oooh - a raise? That sounds nice  :D

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Fri Jul 27, 2007 10:01 am 
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I run 2 Karaokes. I host one and I have someone else hosting another.
Both use sam equipment, Cary same music and the same Karaoke tracks.
Apart from the host both are identical and I know the other is run as I would as I spent time with the person making sure there was very little difference.
I still get people asking specifically for me and saying mine is better.
It really boils down to what people are used to.
You are obviously preffered to the stand-in regardless of how good/bad the other KJ was.
Can be a pain I know but it is still sort of a compliment.


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Thu Aug 02, 2007 8:13 am 
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Babs,

IMHO. Men are not as sensitive as woman. You hurt his returns for the night and he reponded insensitivily to you. Shame on him, its not your fault.  :hug:
In the future just keep the vacation mum (I know it's hard to do) and everything should be fine.

I agree with the raise suggestion, now is the time to ask for an additional...say $25/night and if he doesn't consider it or shoots it down quickly, start a search for a different gig and take your show (and customers) elsewhere. Don't take the loyal customer base lightly. He knows it now, use it to your advantage.

Have some of your loyal customers drop into area bars (1 drink) and ask the owner for karaoke...if they don't have it have them drop a suggestion or a card for you. If they do have it, they can suggest giving you a try for 1 night of which hopefully a lot of your regulars will follow for that night (and beyond).

Good luck...

                                                                          bigjim56


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2007 7:28 pm 
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Quote:
Babs,

IMHO. Men are not as sensitive as woman.




  I think men in our culture are more inhibited when it comes to displaying certain areas of emotional sensitivity.  I wouldn't go as far as to say "Men are not as sensitive as woman".  Some of us were taught "expressing sensitivity is for girls, men don't show their cards". At least regarding confessions, warmth, etc.  I've known plenty of european males that are VERY warm and demonstrative, not afraid to expesss their feelings.  A lot of rigidity exists among quite a few of we American males that grew up in a "Real men don't" era.  This did some damage too IMHO.
Some of us were brought up during a time where "Macho for dummies" would've been a book on all highschool males beds.

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2007 9:33 pm 
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I've known plenty of european males that are VERY warm and demonstrative

:shock:  LMAO  :wave:  Hey Kappy!

Hey Babs. That does sound weird. That's kinda like saying....don't tell all of your friends you'll be away so they'll waste their time going to see you....only to find out that you're not there. :no:
I know whenever my favorite isn't there, I don't stick around anyway.
The other night, after not being able to go out for about 2 months, I show up where I thought my favorite was, and she was at another members only gig. Her sis was filling in for her. She's gorgeous too, but I drank 1 beer, sang 1 screaming Audioslave song and left. I was afraid I'd drink more and I couldn't....I drove my rig. The place was packed....they didn't need me. LOL

Still though, there could be a point here. If your fans really wanna support you, they'll support your bar even when you're not there. You might ask 'em to attend anyways because it'll give you more freedom to move about without getting the 3rd degree from the owner.
I know....I should've done the same. I just don't care to sing for anyone else but her. LOL  :wave:


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2007 10:20 pm 
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I've known plenty of european males that are VERY warm and demonstrative

  LMAO  :shock:     Hey Kappy!


No,  I don't mean like THAT !

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Fri Aug 03, 2007 10:46 pm 
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Steven Kaplan @ Sat 04 Aug, 2007 wrote:
Quote:
I've known plenty of european males that are VERY warm and demonstrative

  LMAO  :shock:     Hey Kappy!


No,  I don't mean like THAT !
LMAO  I know steven! I just couldn't resist. It sounded kinda.....funny. LMAO

You Da Man bud!!  LOL  :wave:


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Sat Aug 04, 2007 8:08 pm 
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You Da Man bud!!  



<high pitched giggle>

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 11:17 pm 
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Woo Hoo ! Got that raise.

I have another bar pursuing me pretty heavily. The owner heard about it and approached me. Needless to say I received a raise. It is only $50 a week, but over all it ends up being $200 a month. I'm pretty happy about that.

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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Tue Aug 07, 2007 1:05 am 
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congrats, Babs!


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Tue Aug 07, 2007 9:00 am 
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I'm happy for you too Babs!  Well deserved.

:oh yeah:

                                                                 bigjim56


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 Post subject: Re: Odd request by owner
PostPosted: Tue Aug 07, 2007 1:09 pm 
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I'll tell you it really boosted my spirits. In a round about way it is a compliment. Owner's don't show much appreciation for a good job done. Not that I need  a pat on the back or anything, but after being there for 4 yrs., 3 nights a week it is nice to have a little insentive.  :D

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