Karaoke Forums

That's a pretty sick fetish,  mines fairly normal for a guy... It involves porn flicks, and an inflatable doll....

(female of course,  I'm straight)

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

_________________

Yep, part of my email addy is code for the year of my birth...You guessed it....one big fat cigar for Kappy!

Wow, I just experienced this phenom on Monday.. I was literally standing in the kitchen stiring something when he walked in...I didn't know this was something that other men did too...Perhaps you guys should form a support group....

_________________
Will sing or fish for food!!I'm not quite right!!

Nope, we don't need no support group.....It's you gals who need to listen.

Hon, if your man savaged you cause he caught you in the kitchen stirring a pot, then you need to keep a warm pot on the stove.

Nah,  Forming a support group takes alot of time and effort,  take the work that goes into the formation of the womens bereavement support group I go to... Although I'm not really a sex therapist, I like to help others heal.... Now even tho I'm altruistic enough to help others in need, there's a limit to how much I can extend myself...yet even that depends on water temps of the shower I just took...etc


Did I just jack another one here ?

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

Did I just jack another one here ?

Huh?  In the shower? Or the thread? LMMFAO!!

Dudes...I have had the good life for many years I can truly say. The woman in the kitchen...though that has kept me alive, if it wasn't for my wife's sisters help from time to time (on the cooking), most of this stuff I could've done myself.
As far as house cleaning, I have no complaints about this, except she tells me how hard she works for me as if to justify being so dependent, then I find something neglected (not that I'm being critical) that is painfully obvious and it makes me wonder just what the hell she's been doing all the time I'm not home.
She does the laundry. She doesn't like it when I start fooling with things that are of her expertise or knowledge. I guess I might eventually figure out that I can handle these things effectively on my own and her services will no longer be needed?

C'mon!! She's not just my housekeeper!! I don't want it this way!! I need someone who can share in the responsibility of everyday life functions and possibly provide helpful solutions to everyday life occurences, or atleast be resourceful enough to try to help. It's like I'm raising a family of minors on my own. Every important decision or task has to wait until I get home. It shouldn't be like this.
And then I have to deal with the trust issues?  :roll:

I feel I have held up my end of the bargain all of these years....staying and supporting my family because I wanted to. Now, I'm just trying to be happy in life without dealing with the excessive drama that seems to run rampant in younger marriages or relationships. Some things should just not affect an older couple after 23 years of continuous faithful commitment.
But it could be that it's time to stir the pot a little bit...explore the outer limits some...find a sweet spot in life that doesn't have to mean ending a long term marriage. But if things don't turn around quick, I'm afraid that's our destiny, and I'm scared. I've loved my wife for all of these years, and dealt with hard times and situations. She's been by my side the whole duration also and I'm thankful for that, but there comes a time when a couple needs to loosen up a bit and let life flow.
Hopefully, we won't flow over the edge and get lost in the river of despair inevitably.  :(

Oh, Um... I never said that actually Perry,  It appears I have a poseur now...Can you imagine a person saying such a thing ?   I'm so ashamed of myself, just in virtue of the fact someone is associating my name with such unorthodox content... BRB...I have to go wash my hands again ~

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

:newlol: I know you didn't Steven. It was just so close in print I couldn't resist. I'll probably get booted for that.
I remember once seeing Ray Romano on a comedy show and part of his skit was like....in the shower, soap is man's best friend. LMMFAO!!
Don't be embarrassed, it's only natural!

Perry,

Wow I can understand what you are going through...It's really hard to repair a marriage after so many years...It's equally as hard to throw in the towel and leave someone that you have loved so much for so long....

My biggest suggestion would be counseling..Not sure if you are Christian or not but if you are many times your pastor at church will do this for you for free and you don't run the risk of your counselor telling you to just get divorced....I would also suggest that if you take this route you go more than once a week at first to whomever you choose....You may also be able to find a marriage support group.  I have done those before and having your partner listening to other couples they often realize that they have the same obsurd behavior....

_________________
Will sing or fish for food!!I'm not quite right!!

Thanks Sharon for your caring advice.
No, I'm not an active Christian, but have tried not to violate most of the Ten Commandments throughout my life.

I'm sorry that my whining here sounds so one-sided....I'm sure my wife could add a few legitimate nuances about me here.

This thread quickly turned into a b*tch session from me when I started it just to get some insight on opposite sex friendships. Then I elaborate on this affliction with a female acquaintence blah, blah, blah....

Proving somewhat that I'm not the saint that I'm trying to portray here. All I can say now is, I don't have a big doghouse out back for me to retreat to...I hope I can get some heat going in the garage or mini-barn though.

OK,  You are about to see a very serious side of Kappy who at times can be...Yes, the bleeding heart wuss....(now back to my first person BS)

I never read all the details of your relationship Perry, Yet assuming even your wife *IS* snooping, it doesn't mean we know what's really going on, how much she really loves you and is afraid and suffering, We only see YOUR presentation.   ASSUMING you called and she was weeping uncontrollably, she's suffering.. Whether it's HER doing or not, we don't know the details, yet still..If she's snooping (and the stuff going on regarding her trying to control you, because your needs now differ and she feel's you slipping away), this HURTS, and she might feel this is the only way she can get answers out've you (assuming she's snooping)... I've had girls slip away, and no longer bend over backwards for my emotional needs (which never really changed much),  however to them I just became an intolerable burdon because *THEY* no longer cared as much... She can be very wrong, and snooping is usually wrong, yet it sounds like there's something that should be discussed between you two...  For all you know your wife might know you are a member of this board, and who knows.... THIS board is open to EVERYONE to read...You have NO secrecy in here...It's turned up for HIGH visibility...All I need to do is enter a few keywords...IE...... Kappy-Karaoke-critique,   (Something like that) and my whole history here will show on the internet for anyone to see...Assuming your name is Perry Cornell she need not snoop really hard....Just enter  Perry Cornell... My guess is EVERYTHING you say will be visible to her in here...

Talk this over with her... I HATE seeing people suffer, I really do...
You two were close at one time....work this out before someone really suffers needlessly...I know many disagree with me, I'm not necessarily correct... this is just what hit me suddenly while I was dusting the piano...not sure why,,,,another reason I suppose, for hating doing boring stuff, (my mind does weird stuff like thinks...I hate when this happens)...


JMO..

Neither party wins when a relationship dies.... both lose something, oftentimes at best, it's just ALOT of past together, yet a dying relationship hurts.. You aren't competing, she's not your enemy... This is something between you two...work it out if she's really hurting...It doesn't seem right to me...not saying it's your fault... Yet something is clearly very wrong here.. and I get a contact twinge in my gut hearing about the suffering aspect of someone clinging feeling something is drifting off dying,,

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

I feel bad that she's suffering.   Sounds like you two can use some therapy..together, and even individually. I know you are hurting too.... Not sure it's a good thing that she see's thing in here, or friends and family tell her about it.  This is wide open, not a private area of the internet.

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

My professional opinion as an investigator and I tell clients this all the time, if your asking me to conduct a surveillance on your other half, the relationship is over.  If your trust is that broken, realistically there is not much hope in reviving it as the trust never gets completely back.  What surprises me that even after I tell them and further, here in Canada at least adultery doesn't make that much difference in court, they still want them followed.  Well if you want to pay me I'll do the job.

_________________
You can be strange but not a stranger

Tim,  sometimes it's gone long before either party can face it head on..  They suffer a long death together..It hurts, yet both partners end up pretty sick..  Yet sometimes two can revive something thru hardwork.  I agree, if they resort to this because they can't or don't want to talk, there are huge problems.. and it might be impossible to rejeuvenate..  

Yet let me ask you this.  To what extent is it deceptive espionage if a girl (anywhere) likes me, wants to see what I do online...enter's Steven Kaplan, and reads what I type in KS ?    That's my point here too...   He's not hidden in here...He's talking to the world..Is she really snooping in places she shouldn't be looking ?  if on HER computer she enters KEYWORD:  Perry Cornell, and reads what he typed about their relationship for the world to see ?

Not so sure...I don't know

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

I know this Steven...I'm not proud of my etiquette with this...publicly displaying private info and suffering...no matter which one of us is suffering.
You're a good friend to point this out, because I too am uneasy about the whole thing.
A few people know about me here, because I told them. And I told them what my username is. Cornell is not my real name. My wife doesn't use the computer at all. She doesn't even have a log-in profile, but my daughter does.
This whole thing started when I revealed that I was a karaoke singer in the little town where I stay in a hotel on my job. This was over a year ago atleast. I never would've mentioned this, but it got to the point where I wanted to practice this stuff at home too. That's when the questions and disbelief started surfacing.
It's been a downward spiral from then on. But being the strong-willed person that I am, I refuse to give up something that is as harmless to our relationship as this. I beg to be trusted, and supported for my newfound hobby.
But she responds with comments like....I think I'll make sex my new hobby...or...you have money to spend in bars, so I want to be paid for my housewife services...etc...etc...
It hurts me that she might be suffering from this, but this isn't the first time she's reacted to situations like this where simple communication could ultimately resolve an issue.
I stated here before that I have no friends. She use to go behind my back whining to my friends about minor issues with our relationship until they finally turned against me, or had fallen in love with her, or whatever, and then blew me off totally.
I have dealt with alot of inconsistencies throughout the years with our supposed trusted, best friend relationship that would've sent most normal guys packing years ago. I have overlooked alot of things, as well as I'm sure she has with me.
I think the being a trucker's wife syndrome is starting to kick in now for the finale...as everyone knows always does. But this is my livelihood now, and until I win the lottery or some other unforseen lifechanging event happens, this is the reality of our life together, which she is going to have to accept, or give up on it.
I'm not giving up just yet, but I don't know how much more stress I can handle before throwing in the towel.  :dontknow:
She tells everyone and me that I'm her world, but then doesn't hesitate to proceed in driving me insane.
I love her for sure, there's no question about it, but attitudes and preferences change on a daily basis with alot of people, and a person just can't stop someone from having feelings for other people or things in different aspects of their lives. Talking about the friend thing, or new hobbies, etc...
If there was anything I ever wanted in this world, it would be to NOT see my wife suffering this way, but until she realizes that she can't control the thoughts or actions of every person close to her, she will suffer with great intensity from her own doing.  :(

Have you written to her just what you wrote to us ?


In slightly different phrasing of course.   It's not offensive at all, and it's concise, and reasonable IMHO...  or discussed this with her that bluntly ?

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

Yes, we have discussed everything I've written here before, but I feel like I'm talking to the wall sometimes. Unfortunately, her remarks always stay right on track with her mentality. And my being on this computer right now isn't helping matters any. It's late, and I have to leave at 5:30am, I wish I had more time.
Maybe someday I will sneak my wife on a trip with me to see exactly what it is that she's not missing, but my company forbids this, I could lose my job of 8 years. (insurance red-tape)
The way I see it now, I will have to ultimately sacrifice my karaoke hobby just to save my marriage, but it won't ever cure the jealousy I don't think. My job still takes me to the same place 84 trips, 168 days a year.
But that will depend on me I guess. I could change jobs, make less money, end up resentful, and still throw in the towel eventually. I don't think this is an option right now. I have obligations that are barely being met as it is, and it doesn't change the fact that I will still be the primary wage earner in my household.
I do have a bit of life insurance on myself............ahhhhhh there's an idea.  :shock:  Nahhhh, just kiddin'.  :no:

She's an obstinate woman, I know, I've been involved with many... They try to control, and it's sick...You can demand you both try a few counseling sessions as a last resort....IF it doesn't work, you'll know you did ALL you could given your life currently...Controlling people are very tough to be with, weird thing, I;ve been with many as I said, initially it didn't bother me, yet as I got stronger, I started to loathe them....Never knew if they loved me and it hurt when I couldn't take it and blew up... or they were hurt and angry because they lost control....or even both...who knows.... I assume it was the later...  PErhaps a counselor should tell her she should give up some control, and allow you your hobby, Karaoke doesn't mean you are screwing anyone at a bar...You did mention she doesn't like your singing... or is it she's not happy you go to bars ?   Dunno.... Yet I believe what you say...  It's very tough to be around...another possibility is Perry, (and I know some will say.  "Exactly what I'd expect a guy to say Kappy,,,you idiot"...). Yet based on your age, if she's around the same age,  can she be difficult because of menopause ?   I've been around that too, not easy in SOME cases.... I'm no pro, I'm no counselor, I hate seeing women OR men suffer emotionally,  it's agonizing, been there TOO many times,,, good luck to both of you !   This isn't a thought out post, I'm just shooting from the hip\, not my brain.... Yet if you are on the road alot, and she feels alone, and she's going thru a particularly tough time,  her mind is acting up on her....  Happens to all we old ladies, believe me...I was born to be an old spinster ....God gave me the extra funny little limb as a sarcastic joke !

_________________
Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

A "trucker's wife" is no different than any other spouse whose other half is away, be it in sales, entertainment, business or any number of things.  The only spouse that I would consider "different" would be a military spouse, only and I stress only, if they are in harms way.

Anyone who puts something on a public board is open to anything on that board.  Personally I think it is stupid to post anything on a public board that will come back and bite you in the a$$ or used against you in a court of law.  

My advice is to go to counselling either together or alone then do some reflection and decide whether to stay or go.  Right now PC you're in purgotory not knowing and unable to act.  What you have to do is get a grip, make a plan, follow through and then decide.  Otherwise you're wasting both hers and your time and is unfoar to both.  AND STOP POSTING ABOUT IT  USE EMAIL.

_________________
You can be strange but not a stranger